“I tell everyone I can about Amaya. This work has changed my life and continues to help me grow on a daily basis.”
Pat H
“When I say the work is working… I am watching it transform everything around me in the most beautiful, orgasmic way. I am so connected to my body… And physical intimacy feels like a spiritual experience. It is truly unbelievable.”
Amber O
“Working with Amaya has been transformative! She holds a loving and encouraging space for change.. I am grateful to have worked with her for over a year now!!”
Mandie R
I have supported hundreds of singles and couples from around the globe, and specialize in helping you uncover your attachment style, what REALLY turns you on using the erotic blueprint framework, and how to communicate with confidence and release shame around your sexuality. Through working with me, your emotional intelligence and erotic IQ will skyrocket so you can have the incredible connection you have been yearning for instead of feeling disconnected, lonely, and unsure of how to rekindle the spark with your partner. I use frameworks from attachment theory, sexology, and the Gottman method combined with somatic exercises to give you the relationship tools that have been missing so it can finally match what you know is possible!
I am also the host of “Your Sexual (R)evolution” podcast, founder of Siddha Labs Āyurvedic Supplements, and certified Āyurvedic Practitioner, Master Coach. I have been awarded grants from NASA, the NSF, and Los Alamos National Labs. I am initiated into 3 Tāntrika lineages from India, and spend my free time training martial arts, dancing, playing in nature, and making music!
If you are ready to find your person, whether in personal or dating apps, rekindle the passion in your marriage & long-term partnerships, and build relationship goals for life, apply for a free 30-minute consult (valued at $250) today!
As a relationship and dating coach, I help my clients learn, practice, and embody the skills needed for healthy, happy, and hot relationships! Working with me as your guide offers a structured framework to help you identify gaps in your attitudes, skills, and beliefs about partnership.
Relationship coaching differs from relationship therapy in that it focuses more on hands-on skills of communication and effective relating to others.
Relationship therapy is more involved in clinical presentation of a client including working with depression, borderline personality, addiction, and trauma. If you are struggling with those conditions, working with a clinical psychologist is a great addition to getting relationship coaching.
Statistically there is a pretty good chance that you would benefit from support in learning how to navigate relationships in a healthy way, with approximately 50% of the population dealing with an insecure attachment style, and many of them completely unaware of it- I know I was!
Growing up with a single father who dated a LOT, and a remarried mother who constantly bickered with her husband didn’t exactly teach me how to navigate relationships effectively. After getting divorced and deeply reflecting on what happened to lead me there, I recognized that I was lacking ALL the basic skills and core values I needed to have a truly healthy, happy, hot, and good relationship.
Suppose you grew up with parents with negative patterns and habits or traits like yelling at each other, constantly criticizing, giving silent treatment, name-calling, guilt-tripping, and ignoring one another’s needs, or you felt disconnected from one or both of your parents. In that case, there’s a good chance there are some skills to learn to help you build the relationship of your dreams in real life!
Seeing your partner with new eyes, leaving assumptions at the door, and asking the question- “who is showing up in front of me today?” is VERY freaking important for long term relationship success. So often couples assume how their partner will respond, what they are available for, and stop seeing the evolution that is happening because facts- we as humans are constantly changing!
How many times have you said about your partner “Oh, he won’t be into that, so there is no point in even asking”. Or felt lonely because when you tried to tell your girlfriend about your new hobby, she just kind of brushed you off and said “Okay” instead of asking you further questions about WHY you like this new crypto project/ power tool/ dance practice so much?
Curiosity is not only a way to see your partner with fresh eyes, it is a way to meet your partner’s bids for affection and connection, which includes feeling interest from your partner about what you are into! Which segues perfectly into the next C-
When I was first married, I was 26 years old. I was in college, worked at a rock n’ roll venue at night, and had zero spiritual practices other than listening to heavy metal records that sampled Sanskrit chanting. 10 years later- I was an Ayurvedic Practitioner, had a B.S. in forest resources, and was initiated into two spiritual lineages and meditated daily. And that in just 10 years time! Over the course of our lives, you can and should evolve. Your partner will not stay the same, and neither will you.
Sometimes these evolutions alter our values systems and daily routines so much that we find ourselves completely out of sync with our partners, and when this happens it can be pretty scary. However, change is completely natural, and this should be expected rather than feared! Learning how to stay connected in evolution is the true test of a relationship and indeed can lead to a crossroads where separation makes sense. And- it doesn’t have to.
By using curiosity about our partners and our own evolution, you can actually create MORE intimacy and depth, especially by inviting your partner into your journey. They don’t need to be as immersed as you, but even a little effort can go a really long way.
Contrary to how Hollywood portrays sex, there is much more to having great sex than make out, orgasm, finish. For years of my life, I felt like something was wrong with me because I wasn’t turned on by this sequence, and I felt forlorn, isolated, and confused about why sex was only fun sometimes but, more often, was an obligatory act. Fast forward to my 30’s when I reclaimed my individual sexuality and started doing what felt good to ME instead of what I had learned from movies.
Tapping into your erotic blueprint, exploring new ways of touch and connection, and letting go of self body shaming are radically important on this journey- as is communicating your needs and desires to your partner in a way they can HEAR, instead of overwhelming them or making them feel inadequate. I love supporting my clients on this journey, because with the right frameworks, you can turn sex into a divine, hot, and delicious experience instead of something to be endured or avoided.
Making space to try new things and be creative with your partner is a CRITICAL component of long-term chemistry and relationship success. To learn more, please visit info and book a call with me or sign up for my mailing list!
Have you ever been in a relationship where your fights were next level? Maybe you called them names, maybe they screamed at you, or maybe you were stonewalled with the silent treatment… Whatever it was, it made you and your partner miserable!
If you spend time with other human beings, you are bound to have a differing viewpoint or opinion at some point, and more than likely, many points along the way! Conflict on its own is not a bad thing- it’s HOW you fight that makes or breaks a relationship. Growing up, my parents were in relationships where there was yelling, contempt, criticism, and stonewalling, and I’m not proud to say- I used a lot of these less than awesome patterns in my own relationships for YEARS.
The good news? I was able to transform my communication style using principles from non violent communication. Learning how to voice your experiences and needs in a non-blaming, non-shaming way is a CRITICAL skill in the relationship game- and not just with your lovers, but with your friends and family as well. Once I learned these tools, I was more than pleasantly surprised by how responsive people were to me- and this took me from stuffing my needs and exploding at random intervals like a burst firehose, to speaking my needs and truth in a kind, compassionate way that nevertheless upheld my own personal boundaries. If I can do it, and my clients can do it?? So can YOU! Which brings me to the final C that is actually the foundation of ALL of the above core principles of conscious connection and relationship.
Learning how to communicate effectively is the single most powerful skill you can develop in your life- and I say that with zero exaggeration. As Tony Robbins so succinctly says “The quality of your life is the quality of your communication.”
And boy, is he right! In fact, most of what my clients really learn when they work with a certified relationship coach like me is how to communicate their needs, desires, and experiences in a way that can be HEARD. Because when you do that effectively, wow! Your life does transform!
The truth is many of you reading this feel uncomfortable sharing your needs directly. If you are saying things like “My partner should just know what I want, I shouldn’t have to ask”, chances are you are struggle with this. And if you struggle with this? All parts of your life will suffer as a result.
Here’s a little secret for you- the real reason people struggle to communicate their needs with others. When this happens it’s almost always because you are future-casting a negative outcome. The mind is a great friend and a TERRIBLE enemy- it can make asking your partner for help with the dishes mean she is going to leave you, it can make asking for your sexual desires mean you are going to be judged a freak and abandoned… and all other kinds of crazy talk!
Yes, creating a powerful, conscious connection with your partner takes work- but trust me, the work is well worth the reward of intimacy, security, and bliss you can experience when you have someone to do life with.
Apply for a free 30 minute Pleasure & Partnership session (valued at $250) with sex and relationship life coach Amaya Shiva today!
EXCELLENTTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. I came to Amaya because my relationships were suffering and I needed to know why. Why was I so anxious asking for what I wanted? What was holding me back? As a bisexual (or omnisexual, maybe even demisexual) woman in a heterosexual marriage, I was navigating gay panic, thought loops, internalized shame, and a sexuality I was only beginning to understand. My relationships felt ingenuine and Amaya led me to the discovery that I didn't know who I was or what I wanted. I needed more than a coach. I needed a container. And Amaya built that. Through IFS practices, somatic work, and exercises that meet you exactly where you are, Amaya helped me drop into my body, feel my feelings, and vocalize what I actually want — without guilt, without restraint. She helped me recognize when I'm spiraling, when I'm not speaking from my heart, and what's really at the root of my thought loops. She also connected me with shibari instructors and teachers in the tantra space, and my community has genuinely grown tenfold because of her. Amaya guided me toward being better at love. She helped me understand my communication patterns, taught me how to express my needs and desires more effectively, and even sat with me to help craft a "I have a crush on you" text that I'd been frozen on for weeks. I sent it. The response was better than I ever imagined. Amaya is neurodivergent, gentle, firm, and zero-bullshit. She's a no-judgment zone who will also tell it to you straight — always with awareness of your emotional bandwidth. She makes Eastern philosophy accessible in our Western world, connects the dots on relationship dynamics, and makes you feel seen as a whole person deserving of love and forgiveness. She works with you to set realistic goals and doesn't waste your time. Amaya (and her clients, me included) are shifting culture around sex toward enthusiastic consent, pleasure, and knowing yourself. She taught me things I wish I'd learned growing up. I will be a student of Amaya's for life — and I'm so grateful I found her this early. Amaya knows her stuff and is worth every single penny. If you're ready to do the work, she's your person.Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Whilst not knowing what to expect, Amaya was warm and welcoming to participate in working with her and a group of women. It was less daunting than I initially thought: she made the work fun, relatable, and really puts theory into practice (which I love!). Amaya brings herself to each session which is delightful to experience and is inviting to others to do the same. She is safe: allowing you to be you without judgement 🙂 Working with Amaya has been an eye opener in how I relate to men and how ball busting I have been and can be. By understanding men better and changing perspectives, I've seen small positive shifts in different types of relationships with men: personal, friends, family. I'm grateful for having been invited to participate in the 4 week imersion! Amaya knows her stuff, is sensitive to group dynamics and how each participant brings value to the group! I would have wished for the immersion to be a little longer. On the other hand, it is likely it felt so short because I had fun! I would gladly work with her again! Thank you Amaya! ❤️🙏🏼Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Working with Amaya has been deeply transformative for me. Through our relationship coaching and her women’s book club I gained a powerful new perspective on men and relationship dynamics. What we learned completely changed how I relate to men— by seeing male behavior as misunderstood rather than malicious and learning to honor the heroic nature in men. With Amaya’s guidance, I’m working through my attachment patterns and learned how to express my wants and desires with vulnerability and clarity. Instead of operating from old defenses, I’m building security within myself and that has changed the quality of the connections I attract. I went from feeling super frustrated in connections that activated my anxious attachment and left me super stressed out, to truly, confidently single for the first time in my adult life! I’ve also been attracting super loving men who take really good care of me and leave me feeling secure in myself. I also have a new group of amazing women friends! Amaya holds a grounded, loving, and accountable space that makes real growth possible. I’m incredibly grateful for the work we’ve done together.Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. I had my first reading with Amaya perfectly timed with a 4-week Immersion she was leading the next month. She is open and generous in her teaching style and the knowledge she shares - I highly recommend any type of conversation with Amaya!Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. We were initially nervous about seeking help with our intimacy, but Amaya immediately put us at ease. She created a space that was warm, professional, and completely free of judgment, which allowed us to be open in ways we hadn't been before. And beyond just feeling heard, the experience was a total game-changer for our relationship. Amaya helped us identify the root of our patterns and gave us actionable strategies to break the cycle. We didn't just talk, we learned tools we actually use at home. We are now happier and more connected than we’ve been in a long time. If you want someone who is compassionate but also helps you get real results, we can’t recommend Amaya enough.Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. I knew I needed support when I reached out to Amaya but I had no idea how helpful her guidance and support would be in my life as I navigate some of the biggest realizations of my life and make changes that support me in all ways.Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Amaya is amazing! She’s super attentive and really gives great suggestions and practical advice! Highly recommend to anyone 🙌🏼Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Amaya is the best! I had 12 sessions with her over the course of 4 months and I can confidently say that my approach to relationships has been transformed. Amaya was efficient, impactful, and empathetic in every session - I walked away with a mind-blowing realization every single time we met. I could not recommend her enough if you are looking to elevate your connections, and so, your life.Posted on GoogleTrustindex verifies that the original source of the review is Google. Amaya has such a brilliance about her and such an incredible way of delivering her knowledge. I really enjoy working with her and feel that every time we have worked together, which is two times now, I get incredibly impactful pieces of information that help me in my life. Highly recommend working with her! Thanks again ❤️
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